Tips on Communicating With Your Spouse During a Divorce

By Sylvia Smith

Find original article here.

Sometimes, you have a compelling reason to communicate with your spouse through your attorney, but it may be more beneficial to make the contact yourself. If you have to make contact with your spouse for every minor issue through a family law attorney, you may end up spending huge sum of money.

Successful tips for communication with your spouse during a divorce

• Some of the ways you can steer clear of communication pitfalls are:
• Avoid communicating when you’re highly upset and only speak when you’ve calmed down
• Refrain from responding to every communication from your spouse. Ignore trivial issues to avoid additional conflicts.
• Establish parameters for communications and let your spouse know before time you’d only respond to significant request at your earliest convenience.
• Avoid the use of social media during the time your divorce case is pending. If you can’t avoid that completely, resist posting anything that relates to your relationship or divorce case to avoid getting counter reaction from your spouse which would further delay the divorce proceedings.
• Be cautious about your tone of conversation. Try as much as you can to speak to your spouse in a friendly or civil tone and avoid shouting.
• Establish boundaries, and make them clear: state your preferred modes of communication like through phone, text, or email. Specify if you only want to respond to emergency requests or whether you are comfortable with steady calls.
• Respond when you are able to. You don’t have to respond after every message. Taking your time will help you to come up with a considerate and courteous response.
• Concentrate only on the present issues. Try hard to avoid acting out based on the previous happenings as dealing with a spouse is an emotional affair. If you want to discuss about your children, concentrate only on custody issues. This will help you to come up with a more productive result on significant issues.
• Get a Mediator. A mediator is an unbiased third party who can assist both parties arrive at a mutual agreement on a number of issues.

Also watch: 7 Most Common Reasons for Divorce

Communicating through your attorney

There are situations when a spouse is so aggressive that it is difficult to make direct contact. In a situation like this, communicating through an attorney is recommended.

Another reason you may need to communicate to your spouse through your attorney is where you have a restraining order that prohibits all contact like in the case of issues of domestic violence.

During your divorce process, the two couples in question need to conduct themselves in a respectful decorum to make the whole divorce process smooth and less stressful. You don’t want additional stress on yourself! You may need to consult a family law attorney to help you with communication if your spouse is acting with hostility.