Managing Emotions During Mediation
Divorce is an emotionally challenging experience – one of the most stressful events a person can experience. Emotions influence decisions – and big decisions must be made during your divorce mediation process. That’s why managing your emotions effectively now is essential for making better decisions for your future.
Here are some strategies to help you manage your emotions and navigate the mediation process more smoothly:
1) Feel the Feels – Acknowledge Your Emotions
– Recognize and accept the wide range of emotions—sadness, anger, fear, and relief. Acknowledge these feelings rather than suppressing, fighting, or denying them.
– Give yourself permission to feel what you’re feeling without judgment. Accepting your emotions is the first step toward managing them
2) Don’t Go it Alone – Seek Professional Support
– A mental health professional, such as a Divorce Coach or Counselor, can provide guidance, help you process your emotions, and develop coping strategies.
– Support Groups are a great way to connect with others going through similar experiences and can provide a sense of community.
3) Show Yourself Some Love – Practice Self-Care
– Take care of your physical health by exercising regularly, eating a balanced diet, and getting sufficient sleep. These are essential for maintaining emotional well-being.
– Mindfulness and relaxation techniques like meditation, deep breathing, or yoga can help reduce stress and keep you grounded.
4) Stay in the Moment – Focus on the Present
– Stay grounded by focusing on the present moment rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. This can help you make decisions based on your current needs and circumstances.
– Take things one step at a time by breaking down tasks into manageable steps. This can help prevent you from feeling overwhelmed. Tiny bites can keep you from choking.
5) Take a Breath – Avoid Reactive Decisions
– When emotions are running high, it’s easy to make impulsive decisions. Pause before acting, take a moment to breathe, and reflect before making significant choices.
– Before making decisions, consult with trusted advisors like lawyers, financial professionals, friends, and family. They can offer perspectives that aren’t clouded by emotion.
6) What Matters Most- Set Clear Priorities
– Identify what matters most and determine your priorities. This will help you stay focused on what’s important, whether it’s your children’s well-being, financial security, or personal peace.
– Creating a plan of priorities can provide structure and direction when making decisions, making it easier to navigate the emotional ups and downs.
7) Take Some Space – Limit Contact When Necessary
– Establish Boundaries if interacting with your ex-partner is triggering or unproductive. Limit contact to necessary communication and consider using written communication like email.
– Utilize your mediator’s skills to handle negotiations and discussions if direct communication is too difficult.
8) Be Patient With Yourself – Give Yourself Time
– Be Patient with yourself because healing from a divorce takes time. Give yourself permission to take the time you need to heal and adjust to your new life. Grace and Space.
9) All About Control – Focus on What You Can Control
– Let go of what you can’t control and focus your energy on what you can control or change. This mindset can reduce feelings of helplessness and frustration.
– Empower yourself and take control of the areas where you have influence, whether that’s your health, your relationship with your children, your financial planning, how you spend your time, or where you put your energy.
10) Seek Support – Lean on Your Network
– Reach out to friends and family and don’t hesitate to ask for help or talk things through with someone you trust.
– Staying connected and keeping in touch with loved ones can provide comfort and help you feel less isolated.
11) Allow Yourself to Grieve – Grieve Your Losses
– Divorce is a significant life change and it’s important to recognize the associated losses. It’s okay to grieve the end of the relationship. This is a natural part of the healing process.
– Journal: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a powerful way to process your emotions and gain clarity.
12) Forward Thinking – Consider the Long-Term
– Think about the future and remember that the decisions you make now are likely to have long-term consequences. Consider how your choices and behaviors will affect you in the future, not just in the heat of the moment.
– Visualize a positive future by imagining a life where you are happy and fulfilled. This can help you stay motivated and make decisions that align with your long-term goals.